Helping your child deal with teasing and bullying
Quick answer
Bullying is unkind behaviour that is repeated and deliberate, where one child has more power than another. It can be verbal, such as teasing and name-calling; social, such as leaving someone out on purpose; or physical. Children aged 8 to 14 often don't tell adults straight away. Parents can help by staying calm, listening fully, thanking the child for sharing, and working with the school where needed. Children also benefit from practising simple responses and knowing which adults to go to. If a child is at risk of harm, contact the school and appropriate services promptly.
What parents commonly notice
- Not wanting to go to school or a particular activity
- Coming home with lost or damaged belongings
- Changes in mood after school or after using a phone
- Mentioning the same child's name in upsetting stories
Skills children can practise
- Responding calmly to teasing
- Knowing when and how to tell a trusted adult
- Setting personal boundaries
- Supporting a friend who is being picked on
Questions parents ask
- How do I know if my child is being bullied?
- What should my child say when teased?
- When should I contact the school?
LeadXkids guides on this topic
- Is My Child Being Bullied? Signs and What to Do
Bullying is repeated, deliberate and involves a power imbalance. Here is how to spot the signs and what to do next, step by step.
Related courses
- Handle Teasing & Verbal Bullying
When name-calling actually leaves marks
- Stand Strong Against Physical Bullying
Know exactly what to do to stay safe
- When Friends Don’t Include You (Exclusion bullying)
When “no one likes me” becomes a pattern
- Know Your Boundaries
Respect others’ space, time, and things
- When Someone Is Mean to You (not yet available)
Courses are part of LeadXkids membership. See plans and the trial pass.
Free parent tools
- Bullying Conversation Checklist
A calm, non-scored guide to changes you may notice, questions to ask, details to document and when to involve school staff.
Common questions
What is the difference between teasing and bullying?
Should I tell my child to hit back?
Can a course replace help from the school?
Related topics
- Friendships and Social Skills for Kids
Making friends, jealousy, being left out and peer pressure for children aged 8-14: guides, LeadXkids courses and a free kindness check.
- Confidence in Children 8-14
What confidence looks like in children aged 8-14, what parents often notice, and LeadXkids guides, courses and a free check to help.
- Resilience in Children: Bouncing Back
How children aged 8-14 learn to cope with failure, frustration and big feelings, with LeadXkids guides, courses and a free parent check.
More in the Parent Library, all free tools, all courses, or every topic. This page is general educational guidance, not a diagnosis. See our editorial policy.